Wednesday, January 1, 2014

When We Was Fab

Just when we thought we could not be shocked, we came across a number of theories claiming that James Paul McCartney of The Beatles fame was replaced in 1966 at the end of the US tour. While there are variants on the general thesis, we believe that there is much truth in the general claim warranting further consideration.
Some of our more learned readers will wonder under what rock we have been sleeping because the story and rumors about the death of Paul McCartney have been around since 1967-69. But with the advent of the internet, information has been assimilated in a way that makes the case more coherent and cogent, while exerting more centripetal pressures on it resulting in more confusion. Thus we believe that now is the time to make a general inventory of the various stories.
Perhaps the signal event in the resurgence of the Paul Is Dead inquiry was the ground breaking article in Wired Italia in the July 15, 2009 edition entitled Chiedi chi era quel Beatle?  by Gabriella Carlesi and Francesco Gavazzeni which provided the forensic evidence proving that James Paul McCartney was no longer present in the Beatles after 1966. Carlesi is a forensic pathologist and Gavazzeni a computer scientist who started their quest to disprove the conspiracy theories. After working with the evidence, they realized that the theories were indeed fact.
To distinguish between the true Paul McCartney and the fake Paul McCartney, researchers commonly use the name Faul – as fake, faux, false Paul, to designate the latter. While the mind willingly confuses the two images of Paul and Faul, when brought into juxtaposition, the differences become pronounced. For example, Paul had a round face whereas Faul’s is elongated. Carlesi examined confirmed photos of known dates to compare the two images using computer techniques applied by Gavazzeni. The cranial, facial, and dental characteristics of each person were startlingly different, proving objectively that Paul and Faul were two different people.

Disappearance By Death
It turns out that there is much disagreement among the Paul is Dead (PID) adherents regarding the nature of his disappearance. Three explanations are offered for his disappearance under the assumption that it was death. The vehicular accident theory usually states that Paul was involved in a fatal accident from which several additional strains thrive. Sometimes the accident involves a car and recklessness; other times it involves a helicopter.
The murder theory states that Paul was murdered, again with motive varying by story teller. The primary theory seems to be the one claiming that The Beatles made such outrageous comments that various groups conspired to kill Paul. One faction says that the Ku Klux Klan murdered Paul because of the statements made by John Lennon about The Beatles being more famous than Jesus Christ. Others say the KKK targeted Brian Epstein because he was Jewish, but got Paul instead. Still others opine that The Beatles had become too political in opposition to the war in Viet Nam that US or UK intelligence took out Paul to blunt the group’s influence.
Finally, the botched kidnapping theory states that Paul was kidnapped but that he died in custody due to health problems he suffered late in his life.

Disappearance By Vanishing
There is another school of thought to explain the replacement of Paul with Faul. This school generally believes that Paul wanted out of the band – again adorned with motives including time for greater artistic development and/or time for health concerns.
This theory states that Paul continued to play an active role in the band, being the creative force behind the Beatles, and even continuing with post Beatles projects such as Paul McCartney and Wings headed by Faul.

Places and Times of Death
The theories also vary widely in the location of death. The primary locations we have identified include the US, England, and France. And if geographical location is not widely dispersed enough, we can take comfort in knowing that the time of death is limited to a 3 month period between August and November 1966.

Sources of Information
The problem with all of these theories is that they rest upon tenuous sources of information. One of the death theories, known as 60IF, is based upon a confession allegedly given by George Harrison – sometimes before he died; sometimes after he died – explaining that Paul died in an automobile accident, but the group rallied to produce a look-alike to continue on as Paul. Apparently they were concerned that the public couldn’t handle the death of Paul or of The Beatles, so they carried on with an ersatz Paul.
The earliest and still prominent sources for the death theories come from the Beatles’ songs and albums which are said to be laden with clues about Paul’s disappearance, the most important being Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. It is a veritable Rorschach Test of clues and symbols, oftentimes said to rest upon occultic principles of communication.
Frequently these narratives and hidden messages are dovetailed to create a theory. For example there is a series of “documentaries” – in some ways slick – which merge a collage of images, documents, and vignettes into a mind numbing montage which lets the viewer draw whatever conclusion he wants. Produced by IAmAPhoney, these videos rarely have a thesis or narrative – simply a lot of suggestions, implications, and nuances which are supposed to “prove” that Paul Is Dead.

A Cast of Thousands
If all of these variants described thus far are not enough, we have a special treat. There are numerous persons for Paul’s replacement, some of the more common being William Shepperd, Phil Ackerill, Denny Laine, Billy Shears, William Shears Campbell also known as Ian Iachamoe, and someone with the last name Pepper.
One theory says that the Satanist Aleister Crowley’s son is the one who took McCartney’s job. Others will admit that more than one person took the role until a permanent replacement could be found and facelifted into position.

The Gift that Keeps on Giving
But there is more, as they say in the late night infomercials. Not only was Paul replaced, so were all of the Beatles. Sometimes they were replaced entirely as in the case of Ringo, while in other cases they were replaced intermittenly as in the case of John Lennon. Again, there are many variations of this general theme.

What to Make of it All?
We believe that the foundational observation is completely valid, namely that Paul McCartney was replaced in late 1966. After examining the photos available on numerous websites, it is abundantly clear that Paul was played by different people and that 1966 marks the continental divide in Pauldom.

Even Faul, in numerous public faux pas - or is that faux pauls? - statements concedes that he is an imposter.
As to whether Paul died or went underground, we reserve judgment pending further exploration and analysis. We do admit that epistemologically the case of Paul’s replacement is crippled from the start by the plethora of stories and the exceptionally poor organization and communication of the various story tellers. Many of their websites seem to be the projects of early adolescent kids.
On the other hand, it is a simple mind which ignores evidence because it is not tied up in a bow to be presented by the Bubble Headed Bleach Blonde who comes on at 5 with a gleam in her eye. It is precisely this demand for simplicity and perfect consistency which leads the majority into lies.
Stay tuned – we plan to publish more on the Magical McCartney Mystery Tour and more Fab stories.
Copyright 2013 Tony Bonn. All rights reserved.

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